Abouts Books

By Latham Shinder

Steve Jobs says Americans have stopped reading. "Forty percent of people in the U.S. read one book or less last year," says Jobs. In that vein, this post is for non-readers. What follows is a list of the best books on the planet. That's it. Just the list. No commentary. No explanation. No proof whatsoever.

I can hear you non-readers groaning from here. What's the point of a list of books (no matter how great) if I don't intend to read any of them? Good point. Look, I'll bet you can name several countries in central Europe (Poland, Romania, Bulgaria, etc.), but you've never been to any of them. I'll bet you know the tallest mountain in the world (Mt. Everest), but you haven't been within a rocket launch of the place. Hell, I'll bet you can name the capital of South Dakota (Pierre).

My point is that knowing these things makes you infuriatingly clever, ridiculously self-aware, and a real joy to be around-even if the information is savagely useless. Memorize the authors and book titles on my list, and you can add mighty damn literary to your list of virtues.

Great books, on the other hand, have many uses (other then reading them). Doorstops. Eye-catching knick-knacks. You get the picture. Okay, so here's my list of all-time best doorstops. And don't bother to read them. Really. It would take you months anyway. So forget it. Even if you did, no one would believe you.

Best Books on the Planet

Without further ado, here is my list of best books anywhere.

Best Edgy Fiction: Choke by Chuck Palahniuk
Best New Fiction: The Road by Cormac McCarthy
Best Norwegian Novel: Out Stealing Horses by Per Petterson
Best Coming of Age Novel: Rule of the Bone by Russell Banks
Best Career Advice Book: The Dip by Seth Godin

Best First Person Novel: Independence Day by Richard Ford
Best Brazen Voice: Motherless Brooklyn by Jonathan Lethem
Best Literary Thriller: The Havana Room by Colin Harrison
Best Idea Book: Blink by Malcolm Gladwell
Best Tokyo Fiction: Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami

Best Niger River Novel: Water Music by T.C. Boyle
Best South Africa Novel: Disgrace by J.M. Coetzee
Best Crime Novel: Mystic River by Dennis Lehane
Best Literary Crime Novel: Train by Pete Dexter
Best Money Book: The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas Stanley

Best First Novel: The Wishbones by Tom Perrotta
Best Mystery: Silent Joe by T. Jefferson Parker
Best Dialog Novel: Get Shorty by Elmore Leonard
Best Opening: Suspect by Michael Robotham
Best/Funniest Travelogue: A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson

Best Funeral Novel: Breathing Lessons by Anne Tyler
Best Mt. Everest Tale: Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer
Best Paul Auster Novel: Oracle Night
Best Cop Drama: The Hangman's Song by John Sandford
Best Short Story: Towel Season by Ron Carlson

Best Appalachia Fiction: Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver
Best Book on Writing: How to Write by Richard Rhodes
Best Hurricane Katrina Tale: Tin Roof Blowdown by James Lee Burke
Best Explorer Book: Blue Latitudes by Tony Horwitz
Best Screenplay Primer: Save the Cat by Blake Snyder

Best Memoir: Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt
Best Short Story Collection: The Whore's Child by Richard Russo
Best Bicycle Novel: Going to the Sun by James McManus
Best Teen Angst Novel: Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Best Robert A. Heinlein: Stranger in a Strange Land

Latham Shinder is author of The Graffiti Sculptor and founder of Shinder Consulting, a network of professionals who provide writing, editing, and proposal management services for organizations and individuals. Visit Latham at http://www.15secondbookreviews.com.